FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT: SCOTT ESPOSITO

I don’t know about the rest of our ensemble, but I’m at that stage of rehearsal where I’m struggling to piece it all together. I’ll admit it’s incredibly frustrating. It feels like a “fake it till you make it” situation - a phrase I’ve never particularly liked.

I’m working to ensure I’m fully off book, calling for “line” far more often than I’d like. I’m trying to piece together the progression of my character and find the polarity from beginning to end. I’m still looking for the subtle nuances and shifts in action and quality that really will bring my character, Ralph, to life.

We still have a few weeks of rehearsal left, so none of this is uncommon. I’ve felt it all before - though coming out of the pandemic and performing for the first time in years, perhaps not quite so acutely. I’m optimistic I’ll get there. But this stage of any rehearsal process is always challenging. It feels like you’re close to something, but every time you find something new and exciting, you hit a roadblock, like calling for “line”, that takes you right back out of that exciting moment or discovery you just had.

Fortunately, experience has thought me this frustration is just temporary. I’m also very lucky to be amongst a group of artists who have each other’s backs - a true ensemble in every sense. 

In a few weeks, we’ll have a finished product of which we will all be proud and any concerns or frustrations I have will all be in the past.