BOTH SIDES NOW: BY NATALIE SANDER KERN, ENSEMBLE MEMBER

After my last appearance as an actor in The Women of Lockerbie, I found myself curious to explore a different challenge within the Seat of the Pants collaborative process of storytelling. Telling a story as an actor from a single character's POV has always been where I felt I worked best, but over the years of working with Seat of the Pants I find myself increasingly drawn to the work happening within the process of rehearsal. The opportunity to work on a production in this capacity, with a trusted collaborator at the helm, came at just the right time. So I decided to don a new role and practice stepping into the rehearsal space as an Assistant Director. This shift from being an actor within the process, to collaborating with the production team, has been an experience that I already feel has deepened my understanding of storytelling from an entirely new perspective.

Why the switch?
My impetus for transitioning from actor to Assistant Director didn’t stem from a dissatisfaction with acting but from a desire to broaden my involvement in the unique and immersive storytelling process that is unique to Seat of the Pants. In the various productions I've performed in with Seat of the Pants, and as an ensemble member of the company, I've always been captivated by the way our Artistic Director has the power to shape not just individual performances but use their input and artistry to compose a dynamic rhythmic wave of the play. Watching the careful calibration of moments that craft these well-told stories, I began to think about how I might contribute to that process. Directing provides a different opportunity to shape the narrative, and I was eager to stretch my creative muscles in this new direction. Grand Concourse was a perfect chance to explore this interest further. The play itself, a literal step into kitchen-sink realism, with its deeply human exploration of identity, acceptance, and reconciling personal truths, deeply resonated with me. It’s a story that requires careful, nuanced handling, and I felt compelled to help bring that story to life from a new vantage point.

How is the process different? 
Working as an Assistant Director on Grand Concourse has been markedly different from my experience as an actor. In acting, your focus is relatively narrow in scope: you are responsible for your character, their arc, how they interact with others and their function in the larger story you are telling as an ensemble. Your creative energy is directed towards embodying that role as fully and truthfully as possible. As an Assistant Director, however, my responsibilities are more varied, and my focus is much broader. I’ve had to shift from thinking like a character to thinking about the play as a whole. This includes working collaboratively with Craig in how each scene fits into the greater narrative, ensuring that the actors' choices are effective within the same world as our directorial vision, and making sure that the polarity, atmospheres, and visual story-telling serve the specific story we want to tell as an ensemble. Instead of interpreting the story through a single character’s lens, I now consider the emotional journey of every character and where they echo and cross each other, contributing to the overall impact of our production.

So you've done this before, huh?
Nope. As someone new to the role of Assistant Director, I’ve been learning as I go, balancing my instincts with the guidance of my long-time friend and collaborator, Craig Joseph. One of the most challenging aspects has been figuring out where my skills and perspective best fit within the whole; being kind to myself and recognizing that I have worth within the process. As an actor, I was used to being the one directed, I knew my job, I knew what I uniquely brought to a process and my own methodology for flushing that out. Now, I’m part of the directing team, which has required me to hone my skills in communication, listening, observation and collaboration. One key aspect of my approach has been to function as another lens through which the actors hear from the director. I try to anticipate the needs of both parties and help smooth over any gaps in understanding. I’ve also found myself acting as a sounding board for the director’s ideas, offering my own insights when appropriate but always with the understanding that my role is to support the overall vision. While I'm still learning as I go, and certainly haven't settled on my own methodology for approaching this role, I have found this new perspective in the rehearsal room to be both interesting and satisfying.

After ten rehearsals over the last two months and numerous conversations with Craig, this new role is shaping up to be an enriching experience, allowing me to expand my creative reach while learning the intricacies of crafting a story from a new angle. While an extended process has its challenges, the rewards of this long-simmering opportunity for collaboration and learning are immense, and I’m grateful for the opportunity to play a part in shaping a story that I hope will resonate deeply with the lucky 51 people who get to see our production each night.